Tag: emo

emotional experience

standing in the rain playing in the background. I love many Billy Talent songs from youth ❤

emo kid with the heavy eyeliner and I also love hoodies still. They bullied me and poured orange juice on my jeans, then told the teachers I had peed on myself. It was worse because I often actually had wet in my jeans in class or during recess, I also had nocturnal enuresis/chronic bedwetting even at age 16. I had other issues with the function of the body. I wore type protective underwear during my heavy womanhood curse and was prescribed this aid from pharmacy like place. The protection works well, I use it still during my womanhood curse and especially at night. I need to write about this sometimes because it does affected my mental health strong.

I was an emo kid but didn’t self-harm with sharp things. I beat myself with glass bottles of Coca-Cola along with plastic bottles, had big bruises I was try hiding from everyone. I had the emo bangs and my hair was it’s own dark brown colour. I listening to MCR and The Used as well as other type emo musicians.

I’m suffering from psychosis and voice-hearing is part of my everyday life. They say very abusive things to me, reminding me of shameful times and emotional pain. They say strange things like ‘she is going to have major accidents in public’, in local grocery store. I’m a psychiatric patient and I’m an Aspie, that is I have Asperger syndrome. I must sometimes write because it actually helps me deal with my mental illness and the vivid memories of childhood adversity and bullying.

Meeting him again

Tell us about your first day at something — school, work, as a parent, etc.

I met my father in Autumn 2007 after 12 years not knowing him. It was him who contacted us, we actually met three times at a spescific location with someone else present. I’m not going into details about why he didn’t visit our home.

I remember being very nervous and excited about meeting him, btw I was an emo kid so I wore heavy black eyeliner on that faithful day.

When I saw him walking past the room I was like ‘omg, he really is just like me!’ and that was true every time we met, I was used to see how I was similar to my mother in political views and philosophy etc but my appearance is more like his and the way we think and respond to others.

This was profound in every way, and I am grateful for those moments and when the conversations were friendly (they were not always, I mention again he wasn’t in our home), and I learned a lot about him and myself in these experiences. I hope this was interesting to others, and true Sámi passion forever ❤