I want to see my old environment I used to live in, we moved North in 2009 and I haven’t been there since then. It’s in Nordland fylke/county and I honestly wish I had courage to name the city. No, wait I’m telling you now: the name of the small city is Narvik and I lived there a significant part of my youth, and I’ve also been in Northern parts of Nordland county in general like Lofoten, Vesterålen and the rest of Ofoten area.
And I’m also sure local Northern Norwegian people know of the rival towns in the region.
1 I enjoy visual effects I get from seeing floor patterns, it’s like some slightly trippy feeling and I don’t understand why other people don’t notice and have appreciation of the visual experience
2 playing yatzy in Easter holiday sunshine on our cottage in the Mountain
3 walking the dog (my mothers dog), she is so funny when we go on a small journey in the outside world; one thing she gets up on her hind legs and I call her ‘zombie dog’ because of how she appears to humans.
4 being with my friend on a car trip around our local areas, finding some places to be outside taking pictures and other outdoor activities in addition to driving
5 music and my semi-meditative state, forgetting my troubles, not notice the time going by and feeling connection with the present time in my inner world
What’s the thing you’re most scared to do? What would it take to get you to do it?
If I ever want to get more formal education I must confront my fear of schools and school systems and generally my fear of teenagers in general. This is a major part of my life and it’s often the reason I write about my school years and my struggles there. I don’t know really how others could truly convince me without me actually wanting to put in the efforts it needs. So those are some of my thoughts this evening.
Thanks for reading my blog, I hope your days are good ❤
I give people a good slow start opportunity to show me who they are. I listen with care and trust in my inner feelings when I interact people most of the time, a strange thing about my autism is that I’m usually good at this particular part of social life and communication. I don’t look people in the eyes so I rely on other methods in my interaction. Autistic people are real people like neurotypical persons, we have different strenghts, difficulties and gifts as well.
I just bought a pair of winter shoes yesterday and I really love wearing them outside. The only difficult things are getting them on and off my foot, they are tall and with lacing. They are named Amundsen and made by TOPAZ brand of Norway, I have pictures of them on this blog if curious what the rest of the appearance is. It’s not reindeer hide but seals, so not ideal for many vegans. They really keep you warm even in -25°C so they are absolutely awesome high boots for our winter temperatures and climate. And my favourite hoodies along with them 🤩👌
stepping out in society feels strange to put it mildly, I do it a couple of times a week now. In my late teens I was housebound for over six months due to my untreated and undiagnosed schizoaffective condition and my severe paranoid delusions played big part in this. But in my late 20s I began more withdrawal from people and I don’t socialise almost any currently. I guess to get me out of my house and out of my dark inner world when I spend time in public I need some help from friends, family and of course health-care workers. In addition I believe I need continuing treatments with medications and to optimise these drugs positive effects.
those are some of my thoughts now around this, thanks for reading ❤
iI’m struggle with my alcohol use and psychosis bipolarity ocd etc. I have been to psych ward many times, last time in end of 22 when I got really strong paranoid delusions and wild bipolarity along, mixed states. And drinking isn’t good for my conditions both psychiatric and of course my temporal lobe epilepsy/TLE. So I need a break from my usual surroundings and 24/7 acsess to psychiatric nurse and social interaction with other patients.
And maybe I will recover after good sleep and not buying the cider too much/often. It often helps a lot sleeping if you have building level psychosis or mixed states.
I really do complain about my way of being, especially on my blog. My looks mostly and the autism spectrum condition. Btw I’m kind of drunk so this is strange maybe, I have a strong bipolar component to my conditions and alcohol + energy drinks is powerful. Okay so on we go. I wish I was like my AI avatars and could fake normal very well in real life, I’m an Aspergian and cannot hide it well. I’m sorry being drunk/high writing and you are very worthy of respect.
I wish I accepted being exactly who I really am, but I’m going to keep fighting till the very end and I’ll achieve my main goals in life I believe.
I love watching winter sports and these are the most eventful in general. And since I’m from Norway we have a lot of culture around skiing overall and watching television sports is a part of it. I like biathlon especially, because of the variety and skill involved. In Norwegian language it’s called ‘skiskyting’ and ‘langrenn’ and we have world famous skiers in both women and men teams.
I hope you thought it worthy of reading, and thanks for the visit everyone ❤
Write about a few of your favorite family traditions.
One of my favourite times of year is Easter when we visit our family cottage in the Mountains by a (most often) frozen lake. We sit outside and get the Easter sun tan, and make heated food on the fire outside and we enjoy it sitting outside on reindeer hide to have comfortable place, we also have outdoor chairs. We play Yatzy and other games including question games meant for Easter fun times. Another thing that’s funny for the adults there is having a cold can of cider, not drunk at all but nice slight tipsy feeling. We have some candy Easter eggs as well.
it can sound like I’m complaining a lot, but I’m not going to pretend being perfectly happy with what’s going on either in offline life or in society in general. And the people who complain about other people speaking their minds is just not right, speak the truth from your perspective and don’t pretend to be fake happy.
grunnen til at jeg ville blitt overrasket hvis jeg vant er at jeg ikke tipper lotto eller andre ting man kan vinne ved å betale for noe. Men jeg bruker av og til å pante flasker/bokser på butikken og der kan man vinne ganske mye penger hvis man er heldig. Men hva hadde jeg brukt pengene til? Litt til meg selv og familien som betale tilbake på boliglånet og nødvendig oppussing av huset, men også betale tilbake til samfunnet og det spesielt hvis pengesummen var stor. Jeg hadde støttet de foreningene jeg er medlem av og de organisasjonene jeg allerede støtter på nåværende tidspunkt.
I don’t know how to explain in English but in Norway we can get some money back if we bring our empty bottles and cans to the local store and put them in a machine. You can choose to donate the money to charity and get a chance to win a lot of money by doing this kind act. And as I wrote in Norwegian language I would spend the money wisely on both my own home/my family and society, different organisations I support at present time.
I have a couple of books I have yet to read in my bookshelf, and I really feel I should actually read through them to know what I truly need to save. I like reading and I also like physical books, and I know many of the books in the shelf are very good and truly useful to me as well. This might inspire me to read more, and that’s a very nice aspect of having litterature and other writing in the house ❤
My father bought me one, he loves to give gifts and this was indeed a good buy. I used it for several years, it was colour white. I played the Sims games on it and used the Internet and video program/CD player to listen to certain music/series. Btw I don’t know my father in everyday life, he struggles with different mental conditions and addictions. This was in 2008 at age 15, that I got the computer from him.
I’m thankful for the laptop and it was a very useful gift. Thank you, father of mine.
I want to re-read every good book I’ve enjoyed and been moved to tears by. And I’m open minded in nature, maybe a book I didn’t enjoy in my early years would interest me now in adulthood.
it can be any type of book, non-fiction or novels, alternative spirituality or psychiatry themes, Norwegian or English language/cultures etc
Write about a few of your favorite family traditions.
My half-brother is a musician in metal genres, and writes in our native language about different topics. The lyrics are often really funny as well, in ways our family understand very deeply but others might not understand easily. Many of our family members are musical, including to some extent myself as I’ve mentioned I make music in my dreams sometimes and I love listening to different kinds of music.
I’m not fooling you, because favourite animal is in many ways actually the reindeer. It’s based on their beauty and symbolism, my ancestors kept reindeer including some that seems to have lived on a farm environment when the census (called folketellinger in Norwegian history) was done in one far-North coastal region location in Finnmark county in the 1800s.
Some local people seem to truly hate them but I think the little ones are so cute and special to see. And some of the cultural value is that they are of good use for both the Saami and other ethnicities here, but it’s not vegan of course.
But so is also wool clothing and blankets, they are very useful in our cold winter season and the reindeer meat is quite healthy lean and of course it’s regarded as traditional meals in our region. I especially enjoy modern variants like reindeer kebab that we have in local fast food places. Btw I’m really hungry while writing now.
What do you enjoy doing most in your leisure time?
I really enjoy the experience of dreaming, I have often quite vivid and interesting dreams almost like movies of some kind. And even the difficult topics in my dreams are useful to my waking life to some degree, we face our fears while asleep. I’m an introspective mind and I enjoy what can never be taken away from me; my dreams.
Thank you for your time and I wish you a good weekend ❤
our far-Southern family love boats and traditional Southern food like shrimps/(also known in Norway; reker) and I love the accent/dialects our Agder county close relatives have, and further back in generations Southwest Norwegian dialects from Rogaland county. We are likely of Reisende origins and I’m happy for the diversity of cultures in family tree.
in the Northern Norwegian region, especially those with a lot of Kven and Finnish influenced cultures and language the sauna experience is especially important to our identity. And I enjoy wearing traditional clothing and most of all our unique traditional shoes ❤
and the animals my father side share in common like horses and cats, and further back on his side even a couple of reindeer living at farms according to census records.
btw, can you tell I’m very interested in our families cultural features and identity? ❤
Name an attraction or town close to home that you still haven’t got around to visiting.
This mountain is very close to our town and I really wish to go to the top at some point soon. It’s famous for it’s history in our region and it’s a quite tall mountain.
Have you ever performed on stage or given a speech?
I was one of the war prisoners in this play, it was about our towns history in the second World War. I really tried to go deep into this character perspective, and I believe it was maybe noticed by the other actors/actresses. It was not a major role, but I really remember it quite vividly. If you know some of the history of WWII in Northern Norway, it will be quite clear why this was important to our town and why we had this play in the teather.
If you could make your pet understand one thing, what would it be?
I’ll be there till the end, no matter what. You are my sunshine in the polar nights, dear little black dog, and even though you are my mothers dog I care a lot about you being happy and healthy.
Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.
As I mention on my other blog my first names are mostly of Norse origin, including Ingvild and Torunn. I’m going to write about our family name Jorunn because it has special place in my heart and the meaning is wonderful. I have an older close relative with this name and a younger close relative being named after her great-grandmother. It’s of Norse origin and it means ‘love of horses’. And horses are amazing animals as I wrote here a couple of days ago.
I honestly wish I had the confident nature and real skills for it, it’s likely not easy being a woman doing this as it’s often a male dominated vocation. I’m going to put a music video here if you want to hear a track from a hardstyle DJ I like who is also a woman, I enjoy her tracks a lot. I create tracks in the night, sleeping. That’s one reason why I should be a female DJ, at least in my dreams 😂❤️
I want to work for the benefit of the have-nots of our society, straight from my inner core being. I also wish to work at the local pharmacy as I’m very interested in pharmaceuticals and health care in general, plus I like helping people find what they need. It’s all connected actually, many who visit the pharmacy are have-nots with chronic health conditions that affect their ability to work. I also hope to feel useful in this way, that I’m doing something good in this world.
Describe an item you were incredibly attached to as a youth. What became of it?
First taste in 2006, it wasn’t legal in Norway then but my classmates got it in Sweden (we lived very close to the Swedish border). It was unlike anything I had tried before, I believe it was Burn brand. I didn’t try it again before the energy drinks became legal in Norway a couple of years later, but one day I had a big can of them and basically I was on a cloud with energy and motivation. My undiagnosed schizoaffective condition made me prone to apathy and avolition, and the energy drinks helped with this.
At some point not long after starting drinking them I became dependent on them to function, and I was a heavy user of these beverages for 10 years. After I turned 18 I could combine them with cider or alcopop/rusbrus (or vodka/rum occationally) and this cocktail was very powerful in my experience, it made me feel much more intoxicated in a good mood. Btw I have periodic alcohol use especially in summer time because drinking is fun in the sunshine.
But in 2018 I decided it was time to end the addiction issues, and at present time I’m only using energy drinks occationally most of the year. I have a can every morning in the polar nights/mørketid to boost my energy in the all-day Darkness/twilight. But the Sun returns now, so I believe there will be less caffeine needed now.
If you could un-invent something, what would it be?
I know I’ve mentioned this earlier but I really feel strongly about this. I don’t believe ordinary people should own guns and explosives should only be used to make tunnels or similar jobs, never target people. And so many other weapons do a lot of unnecessary harm, as I mention in my other blog including metal chains used in violent/hate crimes against children even. It’s personal to me because it was a very close relative being the target of this horrible crime.
Thank you all for reading and we must be kind to all living Nature; humans or other life forms ❤
Can you share a positive example of where you’ve felt loved?
I believe it was 1999 or 2000, my mother was on a several week trip to Russia and my maternal grandmother was taking care of me when she was away. When she came back I was really very emotional and I had missed her so much I could not speak in words. Btw, my mother used to translate Russian language writing and she has had good use of her language skills now with the war bringing youths to Norway.
I love my family members and I know they love me back as well, from the core being ❤
this experience was special to me for many reasons, I didn’t expect how strong the culture affects us even through harsh Norwegianization/other forced assimilation policies for centuries. I was with my maternal grandmother in Børselv in Finnmark county, visiting a Kven family we are not known to be closely related to. I had never experienced being so welcomed in this way by strangers or even by my Norwegian friends families, it was like true connection with our roots. We watched television soccer game and had conversations about the reason we were visiting; getting my Kven costume made. And I realised how Finnish and Kven culture is different from Norwegian and this was profound, I had thought of myself as Norwegian in my childhood when I had foreign friends and our home language being Norwegian. But now I knew at 16 years old how it goes deep, our ancestors live within us always no matter what the State and rest of society does to wipe out our subtle but significant differences of culture.
This changed my perspective on myself and our family, and it made a positive inpact on me in several ways. It was both fun and very deep experience.
And I want to thank you for visiting my blog, I hope it was interesting reading ❤
Nabokommune til vår egen, familien har vært på sommerferie der og det var idyllisk på strendene der som ofte er tilfellet i Finnmark fylke. Jeg har lyst til å besøke denne kommunen ved kysten i sommer, det hadde vært en interessant opplevelse.
English summary: I want to visit Hasvik in Finnmark county. The beaches are reported to be absolutely wonderful and some of my family members have visited this little place on the coast in summer holiday.
I want to mention some more about my favourite animals I wrote about on other blog. I’ve been horseback riding on several occations and I knew classmates who were very into this activity. In fact it was one of the boys in my class who had horses on the farm, I’m truly hoping he is okay now but I’m worried because my best friend bullied him hard and at one point I joined in with the evil ones due to psychotic symptoms and shame in my own roots. And I’m truly sorry I didn’t help him, I was really psychotic and delusional but still I know I’m a better, a kinder person at my core. And horses are interesting animals in themselves, I recommend learning about them even if you don’t have horses or go horseback riding. I learn from YouTube channels especially.
Okay, so on we move
Reindeer are fascinating beings, and I appreciate them as they are; not through some kind of feeling of hatred toward anything Sámi/indigenous related topic. I wasn’t used to seeing them when I lived in Nordland county so I was surprised with a neighbor boy throwing rocks at the poor animals. Never ever do this I say. And as I said in other blog (and other posts on here) I have a pair of nutukas/Saami boots (with the fur on, outside) and I also have a pair of kommager/summer shoes made from reindeer hide. There are also Sámi inspired regular shoes that are great in any winter weather with ice traction cleats on to keep from harm if you start to fall.
And my favourite everyday animal is the dog, my mother has one and this dog is like no other dog I’ve known, so special and lovely in her strangeness ❤ She is 13 years old at the moment and she is mixed breed and colour black (with a lot of grey with age). I adore dogs in general like the Lapphund, the collie and our Sheltie we had for 14 years before we got this dog (as second owner) 12 years ago.
Thank you so much for reading this, I love animals and my cousin really does very strongly advocate for animal rights and welfare. Good evening from the North ❤
without going into much detail I’ll just say I could greatly reduce clutter in my home environment. I love having tidy and clean living space and being free to move in open spaces, I need this to feel really good and well-adjusted.
I don’t have a particular favourite model, but I like the way it feels driving (sometimes at high speed) on the snow. And it’s a big part of our winter season culture, some Saami people with reindeer can use it for herding and travel in Finnmarksvidda region. Lynx is one brand of snowmobile I’ve seen, another brand is Ski-Doo plus several others.
On my other blog I often post YouTube music videos and lyrics, it’s actually a big part of how I communicate my inner world to others. I live for the music and I enjoy interpretation of lyrics and how it connected to the other parts of a track.
Thank so much you for reading, I might find a video to post here on this blog later today ❤
as I have written about on my other blog one of my first names is Ingvild. It’s of Norse origin and it comes from ‘Ing/Yngvi’ (a Norse mythology god) and ‘hildr’ (meaning battle/struggle) and it can be translated as ‘foremothers struggle’ which resonates with me deeply not only because it’s the meaning of my name but also our family history and my passion for genealogy research, ethnicity and culture.
My other name is Johanne from Hebrew and it means ‘God’s mercy/mercy of God’ or ‘God is gracious’ and I also have another Norse origin name I will not mention here due to privacy reasons.
As I am lactose sensitive partly due to my ethnicity (Sámi/Kven people; indigenous to Northern regions of Scandinavia, Finland and Northwestern Russia) I very much appreciate lactose free alternatives to milkshake, and our little town has a great oreo shake at one of the fancy fast food places at the local shopping mall. It tastes very good and best of all no trouble drinking! 🤩👌
Btw I’m having a cold can of perry/pear cider atm, Northern Norwegian brand ❤
they both kill, and I’m lucky I don’t use any of them. I don’t like anything with nicotine in it, both Swedish snus or smoke. I really want to un-invent cigarettes in particular, and please do not use combined with other substances. I’ve seen too many people I know suffer from combined smoking and drinking.
and regarding the weapons there too much horrors from their use against innocent children and other people doing no wrong. Really imagine how painful the injuries are and think (at the very least) twice before doing harm. I hate weapons for a reason, including metal chains used in hate crime.
I really like pommes frites/French fries and I indulge on them occationally when we order takeout or I go to a fast food place. And the food varies significantly from every place and I enjoy when they are just right and with the optimal amount of salt and spices.
I love snacks of many kinds, btw. I try to keep them special, not having every day ❤
I’m not certain that this is relevant to the question because we don’t have many billboards in my region, however we have plenty of traffic signs and symbols. And I really believe Máze Pride could be interesting to contemplate around the true meaning. And please don’t shoot at the Sámi language road signs (in a song from 2000s about people doing exactly this), because we are all in the same boat here in the North. There is no need to hate the native/indigenous language so strongly.
I used to live in Northern parts of Nordland fylke/county and I remember feeling like a foreign influence in terms of my appearance, ethnicity and culture. When I moved back to Finnmark fylke/county in 2009 I believed my life would get much better, but it turns out being different is universal no matter your location; my undiagnosed autism was large part of the experience and my untreated severe schizoaffective condition as well.
What I really love about Nordland is the Nature and outdoors activities, our dialects and the memories of youth that were very happy ones. No matter how difficult life was it never broke my fighter spirits and passion for life, I had wonderful times there. Thank God for this life ❤
in addition to the aspects I mention on my other blog, I could really be more mindful in everyday life. Notice the wonderful beauty we have around us, like the view from our home and the stars in the sky. And watching my thoughts without judgement like I’ve been reading about online, it could possibly be useful even to people like me with the severe mental-health conditions like schizoaffective, OCD or psychotic bipolarity.
I’m going to write about this trip again, mentioned this wonderful holiday on my other blog last year.
Some background: Me and my grandmother are members of a local Kven group and through this group also members of one of the larger organisations for Kven people in Norway. Kven people have deep origins in Finnish speaking regions of Northern Sweden and Northern Finland (mostly Lapland), some (like our family) have other Finnish roots as well, for instance we are also distantly Karelian and Savonian of origins.
okay, back to the trip: we started in Norway and travel down along the Torne River Valley regions, crossing along the border every day with our tourist bus. The Finnish forests are a major part of the trip, and we spent time walking outside and enjoy the Finnish summer. We stayed at several hotels on our travels and I really liked the different activities we had with the group, genealogy related, history and culture. The weather was mostly wonderful and fun times every day.
my favourite electronic device is my iPod. I’ve had several, first I believe was in 2009 when I was 16 years old. My latest is from 2012 and I love using it in everyday life. What my iPod does for me is quite profound; it helps me cope with psychosis, depression and voice-hearing and really it makes my medications more useful and life more deep and interesting. I still have an iPod and I hope it keeps working for many more years ❤
I really want to mention that I appreciate my family members especially, I have no partner or children and I mostly interact with them (mother, grandmother, cousins, aunt, half-brother, nieces) in everyday life. And the bond is prescious so I do what I can to maintain connection with our roots and culture. The time is a great gift to both give and to recieve, and attention is important to connections with others.
I believe this idea would make a difference to most cultures in our world; including the USA, Norway and so many other countries. Astrology is part of something we need to explore in great depth and passion to significantly evolve our general society. All love that is genuine should never be punished.
i have a passion for astrology and I want lesbian/bisexual women to really relate to it with pride and genuine curiousity.
Honestly I would love this business/activities in my own case because I enjoy learning and to explore different cultures. Kind of social skill groups included in the activities as well, getting to know deep connection with other people in similar situation.
Life is good at the deep layers of our lives, and to see Light in dark places really matters to my own well-being and health. Thank you all ❤
iI’m not certain that this is relevant to the question, but I’ll try to answer it. It would be close to a bridge and it’s about preventing suicide and maintain hope in daily life. The band Tokio Hotel has a song called ‘Spring nicht/Don’t jump’ about this topic.
Honestly this is kind of not the answer to this question, but I just write this to help me find out my true relationships. I don’t know my father at all really, and it’s a complicated issue because he has a strong resentment toward my mother for leaving the relationship. I actually know him better than I thought, we spoke several times in 2023 on the phone.
He always wants to buy me things or clothing, but what I need is someone who listen and answer questions I have that only he can know how to explain/express. Btw he obviously has a positive impact on me; I share 50% of his genetics and he is my father! 😂💗
right now it feels like this blogging is my mission in several ways, this is where I meet the most diverse people with very interesting perspectives and expressions. Other parts of my current life are honestly often both very boring and too difficult and I don’t care about this right now.
but I know deep within that my offline life is more important no matter how it feels inside from my perspective.
another part of my possible mission is being politically aware and passionate about this, in addition to passion for life itself.
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