I dream differently when in my severe psychotic states than when I’m more baseline level. I feel like I’m in a limbo where I cannot tell my dreams from my waking state, everything is in chaos and painful inner feeling.
But what if they really are deeply connected, and that both my dreams and my psychosis has profound meaning to me? I struggle with these topics, especially the very profoundly depraved dreams I get sometimes. The hidden truth in my dreams scares me and lot and I want to just dismiss them as nothing special. And this is the message we get from outside world often, so it’s a normal experience to many people.
As an example, I often dream about my father and his youth; including the childhood adversity and xenophobia/racism he experienced in the 1970s and 1980s. I don’t know him, my mother left in 1995 after living in severe difficulties in the home for extended time. He has had substance addictions for my entire life and he likely has undiagnosed mental-health conditions as well, and in my mind it’s mostly because the System treated him with pure cruelty and him being chosen as a target by his classmates/other peers.
I believe dreams are significant and influence our waking hours more than we like to believe. Inside I know of the deeper message of my nightmares and depraved dreams, people in general are shaped into believing insight is truly not important and to be very outgoing, being on the surface level only. This is difficult for introspective people preferring to go deep into how and why, the real meaning of life and living.
Thank you for your time and attention, if you have a point of view on the topics that is welcome to share on the blog. Have a good night ❤
cloudB 